Shit happens baby..

Was browsing my music library in my toshi-baby.. And i was a little bit shocked by the fact that I actually have so many mp3s n stuffs. Geez, i didn't even know i have these songs. A bunch of em. Maybe it waste half of my computer's memory..

Never mind.. I think i'll keep them. :p Hahaha.. So i effortlessly tried to organized them. Sorting albums, titles, singers, made some new folders, and stuffs. BORING. Man, what a lame work..

Eventually I came across Kelly Clarkson's Breakaway. And I was excited! Hey i love this! It's like i found something i haven't seen for years. Yeah, this album means a lot to me. One of my favorite albums. I remember i used to listen to this album everyday all day long when i was a high school student. Great times..

Then I played it.. Track by track...

Breakaway, Since U Been Gone, Behind These Hazel Eyes...

I did that sing-a-long thing.. Hella!! I still remember the lyrics!! Every song, line by line, perfectly, with no mistakes, and grammatically correct!! Yeah, i'm good at memorizing song lyrics.. Lectures note?? Ummm..

(continues squeaking lipsync, my style, yeah...)

And then the song changed, to the 4th single on that album, Because of You.. This song..

This song.. Was it some kind of flashback memory thingy strike me?

I remember those times, when i feel sad and lonely where i used to listen to this song (*teenage shitty problem, hah!). I remember exactly how i used to sing this song a little bit emotionally. Actually, i sang it in sort of hysterical way, sometimes a little bit dramatizing, screaming pathetically along with the high notes at the end of the last octave-raised chorus.. Almost crying (eww dude, what's the fucking problem?? me? almost crying?? get over it!!)

...

Shit.. i can't believe im telling you guys this, but i must confess, those days were sucks!! Yep.. there were this period in my life: where times were totally hard, everything was shit. And you felt like you were the unluckiest person in the world. You didn't know what's really happening on you. You just weren't sure what the reason was. And in every moment you were like being desperate. Problems countered. But you don't know exactly what those "problems" were. Felt like want to cry, although you didn't sure what were the causes. Being sad all the time. Faking a smile, tried to look tough. And the saddest part of all is you were like having nobody to talk to. Alone. Felt like your parents didn't even care, and no friends can't understand you. Your home were like hell. School were worse. You prayed to God for His help, but just didn't get the answer. Alone, completely lonely.

Man.. What an ear-irritating teenage drama

Now i'm remembering those time. Thinking over it. Did that really happen to me? Or am i just making up stories? Was it really that hard? Did i ever cry for real? Geez, how pathetic i was..

...

Anyway, i gotta tell you, i'm done with those hard times. I just eventually got over it. I realized that, actually my problems were normal. Yeah... there are this close friends of mine who share their stories. And from their stories, i somehow noted some similarities of my (past) problems with things their desperately dealt with too. And they made me realize some things: It turned out to be that my problems were normal for a teenager like me in that age. It was just a typically teenage problem. And now i'm feeling glad because it was a COMPLETELY NORMAL thing. And as i grew older, being more mature, i then realized that it was normal for a teenager having some kind of INSECURITIES at their time. Everybody surely will face their bad times. And facing it in a teenage period is a hard one. Yeah, for real.

Things are different now. Really-really different. Time can change everything. Yeah, you'll find more about life as you grow older *somebody slap me on my face please, cause i talk like shit right now.

...

Ulitmately, for teenagers, just dealt with your problems. No matter how hard your problems are, just get over it. Keep on rocking your life, there's a lot of things await for you in this wide world. Don't ever think about doing crazy things such as running-away, drugs, or worse: suicide. Ok, you can think of doing it, but don't even try to commit it ^^.

You're stronger than you seem. You're though. You're smarter than you think

Ok, I admit that this posting is totally pointless. From music-library-browsing thing, to kelly clarkson, then teenage-problem, to encouraging wise words from me. And I can believe I wrote down those shits.